Posted by: Andrea | July 24, 2008

Thoughts from today

When did I become a ‘lady?’  Not a lady as in The Rain In Spain Falls Mainly On the Plain lady, but lady as in ‘excuse me, lady.’  I’ve noticed this a few times over the past few weeks, but it hit home pretty clearly the other day when I was walking back to the office after a home visit.  I generally walk pretty quickly and I get annoyed when people plant themselves in front of me and amble along like they’re pondering the meaning of life.  It’s 42 people.  Move along.

So anyway, I was hurrying back to the office the other day and got stuck behind a classic meanderthal and her two children.  The sidewalk wasn’t that large and they were pretty much taking up all the space.  I tottered along behind them, doing my little side to side annoyed dance, trying to get around them, which the youngest child noticed.  I managed to get an opening to overtake right when the child very helpfully called out to her mother, ‘Mummy!  The lady is trying to get by!’

I’ve always been a relatively youthful looking person.  I constantly worry at work about being taken seriously because I look much younger than 29.  When I was home a few weeks ago I forgot to bring my ID out with me and I wasn’t even allowed inside the bar without it.  But suddenly I saw myself through the eyes of that four year old.  OH. MY. GOD.  I’m officially an adult.  Little children think I’m old.

I was on another errand for work today and I passed by a charity shop.  In the window was a wedding dress.  It was actually a relatively nice wedding dress, I thought to myself, hey, that’s not so ugly.  (for me, that’s a resounding success.  I generally hate wedding dresses and everything else having to do with weddings).  But as I walked away I couldn’t help but wonder who would donate their wedding dress to a charity shop.  Was she still married?  What led her to donate her dress?  I know I’ll never know, but it made me think.  It made me a little bit sad, because I can’t imagine a pleasant scenario that would result in donating a wedding dress to charity.

Of course that made me realise that I may be a tiny bit maudlin sometimes.  Everybody else probably just sees a wedding dress and I see a greek tragedy.  Sometimes I think too much.



  1. The fact that you quoted Douglas Adams just solidifies your stance as “Koolest Kat in Scotland” in my book.

    And trust me, feeling old only gets worse with time. I’m 32, I should still feel young. I’ve seen enough in my life already that I feel like I’m in my late 40’s.

    As for the dress, that’s not maudlin, that’s just a perfectly reasonable understanding of how “life” works. Being a social worker probably kills off the “glamor” and “shininess” of life pretty fast.

    i.e. welcome to adulthood. Your dowdy name-badge is on the table, don’t bother signing in, you’re never getting out anyway. The uncomfortable metal chairs are in the next room. Napping during the sessions is not only allowed, it’s encouraged the longer you’re here. The coffee taste bad and the muffins are as stale as you think they are. And no, we can’t fix the lighting, it’s designed to look that dismal and depressing on purpose. Enjoy your stay.

    …THAT’S maudlin.

  2. AAAAAAAAHHHHHH! 42: the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything. *sigh* We are peas in a pod, my friend. Peas in a pod!

  3. Two peas that belong together at COMIC CON! *sigh* Still jealous.

    And yes, the shininess of life does lose a bit of its luster with my job. But sometimes there are little glimmers of hope that help me keep my sanity a bit. But I think you’ve just described my own version of hell there, with the bad lighting and the bad coffee and stale muffins. Except maybe the naps. I could do with more of those.

    I also have a large tendency to completely ignore the fact that I’m getting older at all. Fingers firmly in ears, eyes closed, ‘la la la, I can’t hear you!’ If I can’t see it or hear it, it isn’t happening…

  4. Naps in an uncomfortable metal chair, NEVER as good as advertised. Mostly it will just wreck your neck and make you crankier.

    I propose an “All-Blogger” rush on SDCC next year. The three of us (plus other interested fellow bloggers) could have a REALLY good time…

  5. Well I promised SH that the next time I was in the US and Comic-Con was on, I’d go with her. That was about two seconds after I realised that every single one of my favorite TV shows had a panel. Does that say something about me and my inner geek?

    But we should definitely all meet up there! It’s much better to experience the insanity in packs. That way, when SH has the Sophie’s Choice dilemma of having to choose between a Stargate Atlantis panel or The Big Bang Theory Panel, she can go see Stargate with someone, I can go see BBT with someone and then we can all meet up and compare notes! Oh I’m getting jealous of her again…

  6. Hurray!!! It’s a deal…let’s all go together! DC, to think you could have been pointing out all the genius that I’ve been surrounded with for the last 3 days.

    Put it on your calendars NOW! Besides, next year is the 40th anniversary of SDCC…and I have a feeling putting up with all the lines is easier when you have people to rotate as place-holders.

  7. Thanks for teaching me a word with your urban dictionary!

    I don’t like weddings either. My husband and I opted for a small courthouse affair. I don’t even like watching movies about weddings. I borrowed ’27 Dresses’ from somebody and I can’t bring myself to watch it. It’s not a phobia…more like a disdain for overdoing things…I should probably get over that.

    Good post, um, lady 🙂

  8. I agree, I hate the whole craziness of weddings, especially the expense! If or when I ever get married, I’m seriously considering eloping. A lifelong dream of mine is to hike up to the Everest advanced base camp and I thought, hey, if there was ever a good place to elope to, that’s it! Now I just have to find the guy. 🙂

  9. I was called “ma’am” for the first time at age 18. I wanted to die. I might’ve even shed a tear. But now some faculty on campus confuse me with the students rather than regard me as a colleague. Mucho thanks.

    I was at a picnic the other day, holding a friend’s baby while she wrangled her other two kids. A grandmotherly woman came up and asked if I had any other children. I chuckled and said the one I was holding wasn’t even mine… not married. She gasped “Well why not?” Her husband peppered me with lovely questions like “How many have you turned down and why? Don’t you want to be married and have a family of your own or are you happy just working?”

    JUST working? JUST working? AUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  10. I once had one of my clients AT WORK say something like that to me. I realise I’d just spent the last half hour assessing his personal care needs, but still, a little bit inappropriate! He asked me how old I was, if I had a boyfriend, and when I said no, he says ‘why not?’ ‘I just haven’t met the right guy yet’ I said. So he then says, ‘Well hurry up, you don’t want to be left on the shelf!’


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